Brave – a brave person. A warrior to meet or face courageously: to brave misfortunes. to defy; challenge; dare.
Strong – powerful and difficult to resist or defeat.
A Fighter – trying to achieve things in spite of great difficulties or opposition.
Inspiring – having the effect of inspiring someone.
I, like many of you who are reading this, have been told over the years I am either one, or all of the above.
In the early days when I was told I was the above, it couldn’t have been further from the truth. How can I be a fighter when I when I thought this disease had completely taken over? The fatigue I could not manage, would cripple me – emotionally and physically. The relapses I didn’t understand. The pain. I wanted to give up, to give in. That in my eyes is not the talk of a fighter.
I was not strong. I had no control over my body or my brain. Whatever it wanted to do, it did so, and with force. It took me to my bed. It made me take more sick days from work. It made me weak.
I didn’t have the strength to fight. I didn’t want to fight this disease as it took too much energy. I gave in some days and didn’t fight it.
How can I be an inspiration when all of the above I had failed in? Who would look to me to be inspired?.
I would explain to the person who was telling me I was the above that they were wrong. I am none of the above…
That was almost 10 years ago – the beginning of this roller coaster – my MS roller coaster ride!.
I look back now and I smile to myself. I AM all of the above! WE all are! We are brave – braver than we thought we would ever be, to have to be!.
WE are so strong. The strength we have to manage MS every single day is no mean feat!.
WE are all fighters. We fight, whether we like the term or not. We fight this disease, mentally and physically every day.
I still dont believe I am inspiring. There are more inspiring advocates in the MS world than myself, but I will continue to do my best to be heard, to raise awareness, and to offer my support and personal experience.
Sometimes we need to look back, to reflect. And my goodness. We’ve been through some tough, dark and scary times, but we are still here to tell our story. Something I and you, should be so proud of.