Ahh, and relax…

Well, I’ve made it through another week! It’s Saturday afternoon, and I now have ten days off work…ten days!

I have already planned out Monday. Have a lie in! Definitely have a lie in and enjoy a lazy day. Plegridy delivery is due between 2pm-4pm, so I cantย  risk over doing it, having a Nana nap, and missing my delivery. Tuesday may be a Skype to my Papa in Australia, then for the rest of the week, I am going to potter around. I need to make sure I am well for Thursday. See, its the hero’s “big” birthday on Thursday, and I dont want to be so exhausted and fatigued that we cant leave the house, so I will potter, do a bit of tidying, sleep, and bake a beautiful birthday cake for the hero.

It’s such a nice feeling knowing I don’t have to set the alarm for ten days. I will let the birds wake me in the mornings with their glorious chorus, and enjoy the time off.

Have a wonderful weekend wherever you are in the world. I stopped to watch the bumble bees dart in and out of our heather bush this morning. ๐Ÿ™‚

Namaste. x

 

Happy “belated” Anniversary…

Happy belated anniversary Plegridy!. Our one year anniversary was almost two weeks ago. Plegridy and I have had a love/hate relationship for the last 12 months. 27 injections later, and I think it is still a bitter sweet relationship.

The last injection, well, we stared each other out for an hour and half, then I was feeling so tired, I had to go in, then it was straight to bed. I’ve been feeling pretty rubbish since then. I am starting to question our relationship a little more, and I am looking forward to seeing my Neurologist next month to discuss, well, a gentle break up with my pal Plegridy, and see if there is something better out there for me.

Now, don’t get me wrong. Plegridy has been doing it’s job. I’ve only had one relapse in the year, but the side effects are still continuing…flu like symptoms and injection site redness. And I feel rubbish since I inject, then two or three days until the next injection,ย  I am feeling FINE again.

Take this week for example. It’s Wednesday. I am sitting here, its a gorgeous spring day, I’ve been to work and back again. Had lunch, sorted laundry and a few other bits and bobs. The patio door is open, I’m listening to the birds squabbling around the bird table, and I have Nina Simone singing her heart out to me in the background! It is bliss! I feel happy, non fatigued, and normal!

But, alas, I know deep in my heart this will not continue – two weeks have come around too fast, and it will be injection night again this Friday. So, I sing. I sing with Nina. I dance with Nina, and I make the most of it.

I also made it to Yoga last night. Could this also be the reason? I do believe it helps me, so I will continue to remove the mental block I have been having, and continue to go more often. ๐Ÿ™‚

I will now say goodbye to you for now.ย  Wherever you are in the world, keep smelling those roses. On days like today, they smell even more fragrant. ๐Ÿ™‚

Namaste. x

Enjoying the now…

Enjoying the now is my motto for this week. This week has been a good week!. My left leg is finally back to normal, and I am no longer shuffling along like an elder. I am walking, well, the best I can with MS. I have had one Nana nap after work this week, and that was mainly due to the fact I had the most shocking headache/mild migraine.

So far this week I have gone to work, cleaned, sorted out washing, the recycling bin, have cleaned the kitchen “spotless” after dinner each night, and have woken every morning this week before the alarm has had time to upset me!.

Now, this is where my little “MS mind” comes into play. I have been here before, of course I have, but each time the mind likes to go around in circles with, “is the January relapse finally over”?. Is it a coincidence I am starting to feel better again after I started putting the Magnesium flakes in my bath again?, or the Chai Tea I have started to drink again?, (I need to mix it up a bit in between the Green Tea), or the fact that I had to get my positive mindset back as I was starting to sink a little low, or the little bits of mediation I am doing, or the new Vitamins I am taking?

I go around and around, and once more for fun, and I need to just realise, hey, coincidence or not, it is what it is.

So, it is what it is, for me at least, but if all the little bits of the above have had a tiny part in myself feeling better, then I shall continue with what I am doing. I’ve been doing the above, plus the Yoga, for the last 5 years, so why change. :).

I am enjoying the now. I pray it will continue, but hey, we all know MS, and it does like to keep us on our toes!

I stopped a few times today to smell those roses, and they were just divine. ๐Ÿ™‚

Namaste.x

 

 

It’s been way too long…

I’m back! It’s been way too long, again, but here I am.

I’ve been struggling for the last few months. Very heavy achy left leg, which has been literally, dragging me down for the past month or so. Fatigue hasn’t been too bad, which makes a pleasant change, but I really haven’t had that much energy to do, well, not a lot!.

Yoga – I went back to class in January, then the vertigo came, then the heavy left leg, then the tears, and I haven’t had the energy to go to class. Again, I miss it, and I know since I haven’t been to class I am feeling worse, and I am sad to say, home practice has been non existent.

But, dare I say, like the Lotus Flower I am emerging from the murky waters once again! This is the “great” thing about having MS. Every day, week, month and even year is different! A bloomin scary different some days, new symptoms, old symptoms popping up again in case we have missed them, and then the dreaded downward spiral of “this is it” etc etc. My heavy achy left leg is gradually feeling normal again, and I am thinking about Yoga, meditation, and sorting stuff in the house, which is a big thing! Months of feeling sad, depressed, grieving for my old body and life, has lifted and its nice to be back.

No Nana nap for me this afternoon, which is another good sign I am starting to feel better, so I’m off to do some lovely household chores.

In the midst of all the above, I haven’t ignored those roses…you just never know what tomorrow will bring…

Keep smiling. ๐Ÿ™‚

Namaste.x

Happy Friday!

And another week is over!. I do love a Friday…who doesn’t. It’s been another busy week at work, and I seriously don’t know where the week went after Wednesday…just a big blurgh of rushing around at the office, and crashing out on the couch at home in the evenings.

My mate Plegridgy is going to make an appearance tonight also. Yep, another two weeks has flown by…I must be getting old, as I really don’t know where the time goes! lol.

But for now, its Friday afternoon and I don’t feel too bad fatigue wise. Isn’t it a great feeling when you think you can keep awake for maybe another hour, before your bodyย  tells you it really needs it’s Nana nap. I do cherish these rare moments after work.

So, I am going to make myself another cup of Green Tea, put a load of washing on, and just enjoy feeling OK for a while. ๐Ÿ™‚

Have a lovely weekend, enjoy the rain, enjoy the sunshine (if you are lucky to have any), and keep smiling…maybe stop and have a smell of a rose or two…don’t let them pass you by. :).

Namaste. x

Sunday, Sunday…

It’s Sunday…I love the weekends. I potter around all weekend, and sometimes don’t even leave the house! But I love it. I do a bit of cleaning, clothes washing etc. All the boring household chores, but to me it is bliss.

The Vertigo which hit me a few weeks ago, really took its toll on me. I’ve been back to work three weeks since the Vertigo episode, but I don’t feel 100%. But I carry on, we have to, don’t we. It’s been tough, really tough to be honest – and some days, well, I just want to give up. I think there was even talk about me giving up work and staying home all day (words from my mouth). I feel my best when I don’t have to be some where at a certain time, put my smiley face on, and get through three hours of non stop work, commute home, eat then sleep. Doesn’t sound much, but constant pain and fatigue makes the above feel like I’m on the go for 48 hrs!.

But, enough of this silly talk!. I love my job, my colleagues are just the best, and besides, I like earning the money. Money I work hard for, so I aint giving up anything!.

I do however, want to quit injecting with Plegridy. It’s been 11 months and I really haven’t felt the best in these past 11 months. I used to have a couple of good days a week, and now…I forget what a good day feels like! Neuro appointment in March, so lots of questions will be written down and hopefully I will get a bit of reassurance, and maybe a new treatment?.

I’m looking out through the patio glass doors, and I see the sun is trying to break through. The hero mentioned earlier to go for a little walk along the Canal…sounds perfect, and just what we need.

So, I say goodbye for now, and hope you are all having a lovely, relaxing Sunday before the new week is upon us!.

I’m off to get some fresh air…and maybe smell a rose or two on the way. ๐Ÿ™‚

Namaste. x

Just when you think…

I was going to blog on Friday. It has been a while, and I had started feeling good again. I made it back to my yoga class two weeks ago after a ridiculous amount of time off. I was feeling good in myself, and the chaos which was work before Christmas, has seemed to calm down a little, so life is looking good.

But…the alarm went off last Friday morning at 7am. I turned over to switch it off and nearly fell out of bed. Whoa!. Head spin!. So I decided to lay on my side for a while till it passed. The next thing I knew, the hero was putting my cuppa on the bedside table. I managed to look at the clock. 08:25am. I said good morning to the hero, whilst still laying on my side with the duvet pulled up to my ears. He asked if I was ok?. ‘Just a bit of vertigo’ I replied.

I then managed to sit myself up and take a sip of my morning coffee. Then I thought I could wobble to the bathroom. One foot on the floor. Done. Second foot on the floor. No problem. Tried to stand to walk, and the room spun so fast, I fell back onto the bed. I shouted to the hero, which seemed as if he did fly up the stairs, and was by my side in no time, walking me to the bathroom. I managed to do what I needed to on my own, then it was a wobbly, head, room spinning, guided walk back to bed.

My GP kindly wrote me a prescription on Saturday which the hero collected. The vertigo has eased, but I am still in bed. It is now Monday.

At first I panicked. When you have MS, as soon as you experience ‘sickness’, you immediately think its MS related. So, on Friday morning after I phoned into work, I’m self diagnosing myself. I have a new lesion. My old lesions are getting bigger. My MS is getting worse. My body was tricking me in believing I was feeling better?. You get the picture!.

Now, I am self diagnosing myself with a sinus infection. Since I have been self injecting with Plegridy, my white blood count is still low, it always feels I have a cold, and my sinuses have been blocked. My dentist even pointed out my blocked sinuses from my recent tooth x- ray. So, I am not panicking. Instead, I am waiting to hear back from my MS Nurse, before I make a doctors appointment.

If it’s sinus related, I can try and clear this myself. Eucalyptus, hot water, and lots of steam sound appealing. If it’s part of a number of MS related symptoms, then let it be. It knocked me off my feet, literally, for three days, and I could handle it, well, with a little help from my hero!.

I havent experienced numbness with the vertigo. I haven’t even experienced fatigue with the vertigo. I didn’t even have a lack of appetite!. I’ve been fed and watered with gorgeous, nutritous home made food. I’ve been bored, and because I haven’t had fatigue, I’ve been bored stuck in bed!.

But, I am going to wait until I am fully stable on my feet until I go back to work. I hate taking days off work, but I have learnt from past mistakes that it really isn’t wise returning to work before you feel 100%. ย Or in an MSers case, near enough to feeling 100%!.

So, another bed day it is. I shall wait patiently to hear from my MS Nurse. I shall not get myself in a state. What will be, will be. I am full of life. I shall continue my meditation whilst stuck in bed for another day, and be grateful for what I have. If my attitude determines my outlook in life, then I reckon I will be ok!.

Keep on stopping to smell those roses. Life really is too short. :).

Namaste. x